The Pronoun Problem

Last week I complained about Google+'s restricted options for gender: male, female, or other. Since then, they have added the option not to declare one's gender, citing "privacy" as the primary reason. This is an improvement, but still not good enough.

First of all, I am dubious that pronouns are really the reason social networks ask you to put your gender front and center. I suspect it's more about data collection and targeted advertising, which is why I focused on ads in my last post on the topic.

But if the whole issue does really boil down to pronoun choice, then why not simply ask users which set of pronouns they prefer? Heck, some people who identify as "female" simultaneously prefer "he" as a pronoun, so it's a simpler and more accurate approach. Many people will choose "he" or "she," I would choose "they," still others will choose pronouns like "zie." And one of the choices on this drop down menu should be "define your own." Some people would love that chance to provide correct pronouns, and yes, others are going to take the opportunity to be smartasses and comedians. And that's fine. Your profile should express who you are, and if who you are is a smartass, then fine.

I don't know enough about other languages to predict all the gendered language issues that can arise. But do you know who I bet does have a good idea? Non binary-identified people who speak those languages. And those individuals will also usually be the ones with the best solutions.

Gender is complicated. It necessitates a text field. Get with it, internet.

Oh Google, Why Can't You Just Let Me Love You?

Jess and I have complained before about the lack of options for one's gender choice in Google profiles. (FYI, Alsica's gender should be "fembot.") Now they've done it again (with even fewer options) in their new social network, Google+, which requires you to choose from "male," "female," or "other."

This is a logistical problem for me; I am female-gendered but refuse to enter this information on social-networking sites. I feel that should be my prerogative. It's also extremely shitty that anyone who does not identify as either "male" or "female" is forced to identify themselves with the flavorless catchall of "other." Obviously, that is explicitly othering.

A whole bunch of people, including some who do not usually blog about gender, have pointed out why this is a problem; check out The Mary Sue, Randall Munroe (yes, he of xkcd!), Sarah Mei (I may have to check out this Diaspora thing), and Dopp Juice. Their arguments against the mandatory gender field include allowing women to mask their gender in a potentially hostile online environment, not being dicks to non-binary-identified folk, and just plain rethinking gender.

As faithful readers may guess, the last reason is the most important to me. First of all, my online presence does not have a physical body, and it is absolutely absurd that gender is considered its single most important characteristic.

Second point: on every social site I've used, people like to get creative with their profiles. People tweak names, nicknames, relationship statuses, interests -- you name it -- to reflect their personalities and senses of humor. Why not gender? I would love to see even those who adhere to the gender binary get creative with that field. (And for that matter, Facebook, why will you not let me declare my relationship with Mathematica? YOU CANNOT STOP OUR LOVE.)

I can only assume that sites like Google+ wish to know my gender for the purposes of targeted advertising. Now, I'm not totally anti-capitalist. I don't begrudge Google the opportunity to make money off the services it provides. But I question the effectiveness of using gender to try and target ads. How about instead of a mandatory gender field, you have a mandatory interest field, like a list of a hundred or so common topics of interest from which you have to choose five? Instead of constantly getting ads for yogurt, cleaning products, and weight loss tips, I could instead get ads for hiking gear, computer peripherals, and booze. Do you realize how many more ads I would click on in that kind of advertising utopia, internet? Do you? Please, take this idea for free, from me, and fucking use it.

A Feminist Logs Into OkCupid ...

Okay, this post is not actually a joke. But your trusty blogger has been doing a bit of dating over the past year, mostly of the online variety. Overall, it's been a good experience. But what fun would it be to talk about my dating successes? Instead, let me complain about something I've noticed: a tendency on the part of some dudes to look for a date by criticizing things women do. It drives me nuts.

First of all, it's going to limit your options. If your online dating profile contains a rant about how a woman needs to have nice nails and so many women neglect this part of their hygiene and so forth, [1.] it makes you look like serious bad news, and [2.] it's automatically going to drive away every woman who doesn't use nail polish. Same with requiring that your date "smell nice." I don't even know what you have in mind there, and I'm not going to find out.

Then there are the dudes who think they're somehow getting ahead by denouncing a part of the performance of femininity often seen as "shallow." Hint: if you don't like women who wear makeup, don't message a woman wearing makeup in her profile picture. I mean, that just makes you look like an idiot.

I get the impression that some guys think they can bond with me by criticizing things I don't do. Like the dude who went off on women who get breast implants. This did not endear him to me. And it's a little offensive that anyone would think it might. I don't hold the viewpoint that my femininity is the "correct" femininity; people get to look how they want.

Now, everyone totally gets to have preferences. But you can state those preferences without being a dick. Try "I'm a sucker for beautiful nails" instead of "so many women have poor nail hygiene." This will only work for some things, though; you're better off not talking about how you prefer a "natural" look or whatever. Basically, hetero dudes should keep one thing in mind: no one fucking cares what your particular flavor of patriarchy looks like.

Net Neutrality is a Feminist Issue

I feel like the internet might just be the closest thing there is to a meritocracy. If an audience for a topic exists, they will find or create an internet resource for that topic, and the best-written ones often float to the top. Since anyone can theoretically go to the public library and create a website for free, small interest groups can connect, exchange ideas, and grow more easily than in a print-only age. (Not that this erases class privilege; I'm able to blog as much as I do because I own a computer and because my education enables me to write quickly, to name just two advantages.)

Right now the internet operates on a principle of net neutrality; your ISP doesn't distinguish between this humble little blog and, say, Amazon. You have access to data from each at the same rate, and any difference in speed should be server-side.

Internet service providers, on the other hand, would love to be able to dictate access. Without net neutrality, they could offer faster access for a price, or block competitors entirely. This could potentially trickle down into search engine rankings; slower loading sites will be less preferred by users, and may then drop in rank. (Note, however, that I do not know enough about Google's rankings system to say that this will in fact happen.)

Last December the FCC upheld net neutrality, albeit with some troubling potential loopholes. Cell phone wireless providers, who struggle to keep up with the demand for high-speed internet access, seem to be granted more leeway in determining what sites get speedy access and what sites get blocked.

And so the battle for net neutrality continues. As mobile devices rule a larger and larger share of our online lives, the precedents we set now will become extremely important. If unrestricted access to all of the internet is as important to you as it is to me, consider contacting your favorite congressperson.

That's Bullshit: Google and Gender

Dear Google:

It is bullshit that, when someone wants to create a profile, the only choices you give for gender are Male, Female, Other, or Prefer Not to Say. It shouldn't be a drop-down menu, it should be a text field. Go read some queer theory.

Best,
Jess and Kyrie

More Blogs We Read

We recently recommended a list of feminist blogs and started a handy dandy blog roll on this here page that includes their most recent posts. However, one of our readers has very politely pointed out that said blog roll is incredibly white. Obviously, this situation is no good and must be rectified.

To that effect, I include below a list of some more blogs Jess and I follow. These were excluded from the previous list because they are not primarily about feminism, but I think that was kind of a fail on my part. After all, these issues do intersect (a lot), and ignoring blogs that are about both race and feminism when discussing feminist blogs has the effect of filtering out most non-white writers.

• The Black Snob: Writer Danielle Benton's personal blog about race issues, her personal life, and sometimes pop culture.


• Ill Doctrine: Jay Smooth talks about mostly hip hop but also race issues. He is amazingly articulate. After his vlog on Roman Polanski I decided that this is my next husband. He doesn't know it yet.


• PostBourgie: "A running, semi-orderly conversation about class and politics and media and gender and whatever else we can think of."


• Racialicious: "A collaborative weblog discussing media coverage of the multiracial community."

I would also like to solicit suggestions from our readers. Reader Andrew has already provided us with a list of his favorites including Threadbared, TransGriot, What Tami Said, Muslimah Media Watch, The Angry Black Woman, and Restructure!

______________________________
Also, there are people I think we should be aware of who don't necessarily blog, like Cornel West, Tavis Smiley, and Johann Hari. -- Jess

Our Favorite Blogs

It is high time we gave props to our blogging forebearers. If you enjoy Nth Wave Feminism, you may enjoy many of these blogs even more. And if this is the first/only feminist blog you've read, and your reaction to everything we write is knee-jerk disagreement, consider doing a little supplemental reading.

• Feministing: This is a collaborative blog created to amplify the voices of young feminists. Many new posts appear every day and the focus is quite broad. It is a great first stop for those new to the feminist blogosphere.


• Tiger Beatdown: Sady Doyle and collaborators write long, rambling, but funny posts on a variety of feminist topics and organize twitter protests against rape apologists.


• Schooling Inequality: This is by an educator who writes a lot about race, LGBTQ issues, and feminism in schools. She is brilliant. If you care about education, read this blog.


• Fugitivus: One woman's personal insights on feminism, rape, and rape culture.


• Yes Means Yes: An extension of the book of the same name, this blog primarily features the work of Thomas Macaulay Millar, in which he focuses on rape culture.


• Two Whole Cakes: Lesley Kinzel blogs on Fat Acceptance and related topics.


• The Rotund: Marianne Kirby also blogs about Fat Acceptance. Two Whole Cakes and The Rotund have very similar tone and topic; their authors also do joint podcasts, if you prefer that sort of thing.


• Kate Harding used to blog regularly at Shapely Prose on the topics of feminism and Fat Acceptance. She continues to write, albeit with reduced volume, at her current site.
  

There are also a few now-defunct blogs that are definitely worth checking out:

• The Sexist: Amanda Hess wrote this one-woman blog about sexism (surprise!) at the Washington City Paper for years. She left in 2010 and has continued to write elsewhere, but the archives of this most excellent blog are still available for your enjoyment.


• Broadsheet: This column featured a rotating group of writers and focused on women's issues with varying degrees of radicalism.


• Target: Women: Sarah Haskins sends up commercials targeted towards a female audience. It is absolutely hilarious. If you click on no other link on this list, you should click on this one.

Social Media: We Catch Up to 2007

We have a Twitter page now! Follow us, if you dare.

Oh, and you can now e-mail us at nthwavefeminism@gmail.com, should you be so moved.