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| Photography by Gary Tumilty |
When gay bars or gay-straight alliances fill up with straight people, what was previously a safe space for queer individuals can lose that feeling of safety. And a true ally will respect their friends' need for safe space and their friends' right to choose what that means, rather than pestering them to justify it.
The need for and ability to construct a safe space is going to vary person by person and issue by issue; when it comes to discussing women in science, many of my colleagues, male and female, can see no value in a woman-dominated safe space, while I find one highly useful. The dynamic simply changes when no men are present.* Another example lies in online communities; I consider Feministing to be a safe space for me where I can read the comments section of any post without encountering trolls, yet one of their own contributors feels that no space, including Feministing, can be a safe one for her.
I often hear the desire for a safe space criticized as an unwillingness to engage with the world at large. First of all, I see no problem with such an unwillingness; lesbian separatism is a valid lifestyle choice, in my humble opinion. But most people remain engaged with mainstream culture. An individual may or may not choose to broadly share the ideas they generate within their safe space of choice, but enough do that there is no excuse for ignorance. If you want to know more about a group, I guarantee you that there's a blog about it. Go forth and Google!
*For instance, you can discuss sexism in science without encountering a wave of hostility.
'When gay bars or gay-straight alliances fill up with straight people, what was previously a safe space for queer individuals can lose that feeling of safety. And a true ally will respect their friends' need for safe space and their friends' right to choose what that means, rather than pestering them to justify it.'
ReplyDeleteTotally. I often catch myself trying to invite myself to 'girls' night out'-esque events -- usually to show how down I am with it. Then I have to remember that often those events function as safe spaces. If my presence is desired, it will be requested. If not, I should keep my nose out.
And in addition, just as gay bars can lose their safe space quality as straights fill them up, safe spaces can also act as vehicles for oppression when they are one-dimensional. The Michigan Womyn's Music Festival is notoriously transphobic (if they've changed, it's only recently). And Castro can often be hostile to gays of color. At a recent workshop I attended, I learned that deaf lesbians started their own center due to the misogyny at the Castro deaf LGBT center.
Also: lesbian separatism is awesome. I remember learning about separatist communities a few years ago and thinking what a great idea it was. I actually think the lack of more homogeneous communities is what makes fewer women identify as feminists and organize. A community can act as a large safe space, even if it's not separatist.
@Andrew: Exactly x 10.
ReplyDeleteThe issue of women's-only spaces is a big debate even just in the little queer community I hang with. They tend to exclude trans people, and that pisses me off, so I don't go. I don't believe the Michigan Womyn's Music Festival has changed, though I could be mistaken. They're the most well-known offenders, but there are many.
I think in these kinds of cases, it's an issue of a relatively more privileged group excluding a more marginalized group, and I never like that. Spaces just for white people freak me out, but spaces just for black people don't. And trans-only festivals or whatever sound like lots of fun and something I would support (though, as with you and ladies' night events, I wouldn't go).
I think you'd probably enjoy the work a friend of mine does on queer social movements. I'll see if she'll share her masters thesis.